Wednesday, 25 June 2008

When sisterhood hurts

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At the charity bazzar a sister approached me , who i met 7 years ago when she first arrived to the UK as a new bride , alone, confused and lonely. For the sake of allah i really went out of my way to befriend this sister and offer her sisterhood for the sake of Allah. Such a kind and special sister mashaAllah. She asked me at the bazzar why we were not intouch , i told her if you looked for me , you would have found me. I made every effort to ensure sisters had my contact details, so thoses that bother would have found me! The sister didn't like to hear this, i told her i was totally disamayed with the sisterhood i shared once i made hijrah. When i was in need of my sisters i found not one and this hurt me. MashaAllah the sister appoligied and asked me to forgive her. The sister wants sisterhood and we exchanged numbers.Photobucket Sometimes you have to take a stance, ok as muslimahs we are encouraged to do good , forgive, and forget but Allah does not tell me lay onthe floor and let sisters trample over me, even i have standards. So i plan to be more assertie and make my feeling heard. Some may think i am wrong but i am sick of turning the other cheek and letting others mess with my emotions, when all i want is love for the sake of Allah.
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6 comments:

ammena said...

alhamdulillah u got through this sis.. you?? a doormat? i find that hard to believe could happen :P masha'allah. i pray you will never be as alone as you were when we first met *hugs*

Rainbow In The Grey Sky said...

FUNNY THING IS SISTER I WANT TO BE ALONE, SUBHANALLAH I NEVER THOUGHTTO SAY THIS BUT I FEEL I HAVE ENVOLVED IN MY SOLITUDE OF ALGERIA AND NOW ACTUALLY LIKE TO BE ALONE, NO 100% NATURALLY BUT LIMMITED, I FEEL SOMETHING WE FILL OUR LIVES SO MUCH THAT WE MISS THE REAL ISSUES AND PURPOSE. i FEEL THE FAMILY AND HOME NEED MY ENERGIES NOW AND PRIORTIES AND THATS HOW IT WILL BE. i JUST FEEL LIVING IN ALGERIA FOR 3YRS LONELY WAS NOT WITH OUT WISDOM. IT OPENED MY EYES TO THE SUPERFICAL SISTERHOOD THAT WE OFTEN SHARE, SOMETIMES I KEEP REMINDING MYSELF MAYBE MY STANDARDS ARE TOO HIGH BUT THEN I AM DISOWNED FROM MY MATERNAL FAMILY WITH ONLY A SCKECTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY MUM ALHAMDUILAH , SO I LOOK TO MY SISTERS IN ISLAM FOR SISTERHOOD, I MEAN REAL SISTERHOOD, NOT THE FAKE ONE,YOU KNOW THE LIP SERVICE. iF ANYTHING I HAVE LEARNT PEOPLE CAN BE SO SELFISH, ITS ALL ONLY FOR THERE OWN GAIN, IF IT WONT BENEFIT THEM THEY WONT BOTHER WITH YOU, WELL FAMILY OR OTHERWISE I AM NOT INTRESTED, YOU CAN KEEP IT!

Rainbow In The Grey Sky said...

OPPS SORRY TO SHOUT MY DS left the caps on...........i am carm really I AM !!!!

Somayya said...

AsSalaam Alaikum

Good for you sis - sometimes we need to stand up for ourselves, and it does people good to hear the truth too. Inshallah you have good friends around you now (even if you are a long way away at the moment :[

Rainbow In The Grey Sky said...

Thanks sommayah yes i have discovered real friends new friends in the making but mashaAllah Sommayah, genuine friends, i would rather have a handful of goodmates than a list of non worthy ones. I am the first to make 71 excauses for my sisters in Islam and thoses that know me will vouch this but enough is enough, i have a heart too. i have feelings too, i cry too, i belong tooo, i didn't fall out of a tree, i have a heritage too. ALHAMDUILAH

Umm Ibrahim said...

Assalaamu alaikum,

Alhamdu Lillah you spoke up and made the sister understand insha'Allah. I hear that line too often about, "Why haven't we seen you?" Picking up the phone or enquiring through other sisters is easy but people make it seem so difficult.

I agree a few close sisters is best masha'allah.

Prayers for Peace

Prayers for Peace